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10 Words to Use in Conversation to Get What You Want


The words we use every day shape our realities and our word choices can make a powerful impression on the people around us, whether they occur in a polite conversation at the grocery store or during a more formal exchange at a significant business meeting. Different situations and different companions demand different levels of vocabulary and tone, but there are some words that hold power, no matter what the situation. Next time you’re pressing for something you want—whether it's a closing a deal or the last pineapple in the produce section—use these 10 words that can help you get it.

1. 'Because'

“Because” is the outlet you will use to explain your motivations for every element of your request. This is request + reason and this combination significantly increases the likelihood that your request will be obliged. The word ‘because’ triggers something in people that causes them to oblige requests.

2. 'Thanks'

A simple thanks is an expression of immediate gratitude, and if you start your conversation with it, you’ll start everything off on a good note. You’ll show that you’re appreciative, which will make people more interested and willing to help you out. Something like “thanks for your time” at the beginning of a meeting (or at the end) is all it takes to establish that positive tone.

3. 'You'

When extending requests, too many people make it all about themselves. They'll say things like, “I want this because I need it,” explaining their personal motivations or the logical reasons why they want it. Instead, try framing the conversation in the perspective of the person you’re talking to. How will your request affect them? Make your listener the center of the conversation, which makes for a more positive engagement.

4. 'If'

“If” holds a ton of power because it gives you the opportunity to break a situation down to its most basic terms by looking at hypothetical outcomes. As long as you’ve done your research, or at least some brainstorming, you’ll come out in a good position.

5. 'Could'

Using the word “could” implies openness, unlike the word “won’t” or “never.” This keeps the conversation positive, and further allows you to explore your potential future outcomes, which is especially handy when your conversational partner has a counterargument or request for you.

6. 'We'

Like the word “you,” “we” takes some of the focus off your own self-interest. This makes you seem less egocentric and more welcoming. Additionally, it implies that the two of you are a single unit, and that any positive benefit for you will be a positive benefit for them.

7. 'Together'

“Together” works much the same way that “we” does. It implies a degree of familiarity and cooperation, providing a kind of conversational lubricant to make your requests easier to swallow. Anything you can do to make your request (and hypothetical future) seem like a mutual opportunity is going to help you here.

8. 'Fact'

The word “fact” can help you out significantly in your attempts at persuasion. Be sure that the facts you claim are actual facts, supportable with empirical evidence or research of some kind. Using more facts in your dialogue will help you strengthen your position, and secure a more persuasive angle for your discussion.

9. 'Open'

During the conversation, you won’t agree with everything the other person tells you, and you won’t comply with every request. But shutting these requests down with a “no” or a “never” is negative and counterproductive. Instead, state that you’re “open” to the idea, but further negotiation will be required before you fully agree.

10. 'Will'

“Will” is the word we use to switch to future tense, and it’s a powerful word because it implies what happens after the conversation is over with a degree of certainty. Stating that you “will” do something as a direct action provides a clear vision and mitigates the possibility of miscommunication.

These ten words aren't magical, nor do they affect listeners at the level of mind control. But, used in the proper context, they can help you open the door to a meaningful and mutual negotiation. You’ll come across as more open, intelligent and persuasive, which means you’ll have an edge when you make your argument.

Small changes to your vocabulary in face-to-face conversations or via email can have big impacts on your business. Ready to give this trick a try in your own entrepreneurial endeavor?  EXIT Realty Massachusetts is looking for franchise owners like you. Spend just 30 minutes to find out how to get started, and bring your willingness to learn and entrepreneurial spirit, and EXIT Realty will provide you with the tools and resources to take your career to new levels.



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